I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
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