No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
Randomize