can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
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