therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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