Dear everyone that texted me last night wondering where i was. i ended up face down blacked up drunk before i made it to the party. My bad
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
Randomize
