Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
