You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
