You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
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