he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
should my penis look like a turkey
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
Randomize
