Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
So squirting runs in the family.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
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