omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
