No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
