If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
Randomize
