I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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