He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
Strip clubs it is bday boy. One condition. I am in full custody of your ID. I plan on being in no condition to coordinate rescue operations and we need to keep casualties to a minimum. You cannot be trusted.
Alright goddamnit. Can I bring my pirate hat?
I insist.
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
Randomize
