Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
Randomize
