Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Can Purell be used as lube?
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
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