he wants to bone in the snuggie
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
Randomize
