No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
Randomize
