So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
He texts me "what are you wearing" in the middle of the workday, so naturally I assume he's kidding and respond "the blood of my enemies" #foreveralone
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
Holy sore nipples Batman
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
Randomize