i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
I showed him my bush... on skype.
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
Randomize
