margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize
