does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
He wouldn't let me put a red handprint on his face or scream to him everytime he walked away.
Why did you want to do any of that?
If someones last name is Wilson, you are obligated to pretend that you are Tom Hanks and they are a Volleyball and quote the movie when you speak to them.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
Damn victory sex feels great
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
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