My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
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