mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents.
God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol.
Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
Randomize