I think I just saw someone hide a body.
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
Randomize
