Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
Randomize