D3 body, D1 cock
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
