Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
Randomize
