I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
