I totally just used John Mayer's lyrics to get laid.
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
Every concussion has its silver lining
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
Randomize
