if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
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