You're so nebulous sometimes
Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Randomize
