I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
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