She was so drunk that I kept trying to switch out her wine for water. Sort of like Jesus, but in reverse.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize
