Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
I am one with the molecules
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
