Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
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