I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Randomize
