I slept walked to the toilet and woke up pooping. Easily one of the most disorienting events of my life.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
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