He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
Mom said you looked used
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
Randomize
