I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
