i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Randomize
