Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
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