tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
Randomize
