So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
Randomize
