I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
