I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Randomize
