If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
