My sheets look like a crime scene.
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
