My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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