My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
Randomize
