walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Randomize