Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize